野草 Wild Grass14 / 22

墓碣文 Epitaph

我夢見自己正和墓碣對立，讀着上面的刻辭。I dreamed I was standing face to face with a gravestone, reading the words carved upon it.那墓碣似是沙石所製，剝落很多，又有苔蘚叢生，僅存有限的文句！The gravestone seemed to be made of sandstone, much of it crumbled away, and moss grew thick upon it, so that only a few lines of text remained!

我梦见自己正和墓碣对立，读着上面的刻辞。那墓碣似是沙石所制，剥落很多，又有苔藓丛生，仅存有限的文句！

『……'......于浩歌狂熱之際中寒；In the midst of wild singing and frenzy I was seized by a chill;于天上看見深淵。in the heavens I saw an abyss.于一切眼中看見無所有；In all eyes I saw nothingness;于無所希望中得救。……in hopelessness I found salvation......

『……于浩歌狂热之际中寒；于天上看见深渊。于一切眼中看见无所有；于无所希望中得救。……

『……'......有一游魂，化爲長蛇，口有毒牙。There was a wandering soul that turned into a long serpent, with poison fangs in its mouth.不以嚙人，自嚙其身，終以殞顚。……Not to bite others, but biting itself, until at last it perished......

『……有一游魂，化为长蛇，口有毒牙。不以啮人，自啮其身，终以殒顚。……

『……'......離開！……』Go away!......'

『……离开！……』

我繞到碣後，纔見孤墳，上無草木，且已頹壞。I walked around behind the gravestone, and only then saw a solitary grave, bare of grass or trees, already fallen into ruin.卽從大闕口中，窺見死屍，胸腹俱破，中無心肝。Through the great gap in it I glimpsed a corpse, its chest and belly both torn open, with neither heart nor liver inside.而臉上卻絕不顯哀樂之狀，但濛濛如烟然。Yet its face showed no trace of sorrow or joy, but was hazy and blurred as though wreathed in smoke.

我绕到碣后，才见孤坟，上无草木，且已颓坏。即从大阙口中，窥见死尸，胸腹俱破，中无心肝。而脸上却绝不显哀乐之状，但蒙蒙如烟然。

我在疑懼中不及迴身，然而已看見墓碣陰面的殘存的文句！In my doubt and dread I had no time to turn away, and I had already seen the words remaining on the back of the gravestone!

我在疑惧中不及回身，然而已看见墓碣阴面的残存的文句！

『……'......抉心自食，欲知本味。Tearing out my own heart to eat, I wished to know its true taste.創痛酷烈，本味何能知？……The pain of the wound was so fierce, how could I know its true taste?......

『……抉心自食，欲知本味。创痛酷烈，本味何能知？……

『……'......痛定之後，徐徐食之。After the pain had subsided, I ate it slowly.然其心已陳舊，本味又何由知？……But the heart had already gone stale, so how could its true taste be known?......

『……痛定之后，徐徐食之。然其心已陈旧，本味又何由知？……

『……'......答我。Answer me.否則，離開！……』Otherwise, go away!......'

『……答我。否则，离开！……』

我就要離開。I was about to leave.而死屍已在墳中坐起，口脣不動，然而說──But the corpse had already sat up in the grave, and though its lips did not move, it spoke —

我就要离开。而死尸已在坟中坐起，口唇不动，然而说──

『待我成塵時，你將見我的微笑！』'When I have turned to dust, you will see my smile!'

『待我成尘时，你将见我的微笑！』

我疾走，不敢反顧，生怕看見他的追隨。I fled swiftly, not daring to look back, dreading to see it following after me.

我疾走，不敢反顾，生怕看见他的追随。

（一九二五年六月十七日。）(June 17, 1925.)

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What it’s about

A dream of reading a gravestone. The stone is sandstone, badly flaked and overgrown with moss, and only fragments of the inscription are left: caught a chill in the middle of a wild and fevered song; saw the abyss while looking at the sky; saw nothing at all in every pair of eyes; was saved where there was nothing left to hope for. And then: there was a wandering soul that turned into a long snake with poison fangs, and it bit nobody, but bit its own body, and so perished. And then: go away.

He walks round behind the stone and finds the grave itself, bare of grass and trees and already fallen in, and through the gap he sees the corpse — chest and belly split open, no heart and no liver inside, and on the face no grief and no joy, only a mist. Before he can turn away he has read what survives on the back of the stone: it tore out its own heart and ate it, wanting to know the true taste, but the pain was so cruel that the taste could not be known; and when the pain had settled and it ate slowly, the heart had gone stale, so the taste could not be known that way either. Answer me. Otherwise, go away. He turns to leave, and the corpse sits up in the grave and says, without moving its lips: when I have turned to dust, you will see me smile. He runs, not daring to look back, afraid of seeing it come after him.

When it was written 背景

Dated 17 June 1925, the day after 失掉的好地獄, and the shortest of the dreams. It is also, for most readers, the most direct self-portrait in 野草: the snake that eats itself and the corpse with nothing left inside it are both figures for a mind that has turned its scepticism on itself. A learner should be warned that the inscriptions are in classical Chinese, deliberately damaged and printed with ellipses where the stone has flaked — parallel four-character clauses, 于…于…, 何能知, 何由知 — so the quoted lines need much slower reading than anything around them, while the narrator's own sentences are plain and modern. It is a good page for seeing how much of Lu Xun's effect comes from the join between the two registers.

Words in this chapter 生词