一覺 The Awakening

飛機負了擲下炸彈的使命，像學校的上課似的，每日上午在北京城上飛行。Airplanes, bearing the mission of dropping bombs, flew over the city of Beijing every morning, like classes at school.每聽得機件搏擊空氣的聲音，我常覺到一種輕微的緊張，宛然目覩了『死』的襲來，但同時也深切地感着『生』的存在。Whenever I heard the sound of the machinery beating against the air, I would often feel a slight tension, as if I had witnessed the assault of 'Death' with my own eyes, but at the same time I also felt deeply the presence of 'Life.'

飞机负了掷下炸弹的使命，像学校的上课似的，每日上午在北京城上飞行。每听得机件搏击空气的声音，我常觉到一种轻微的紧张，宛然目覩了『死』的袭来，但同时也深切地感着『生』的存在。

隱約聽到一二爆發聲以後，飛機嗡嗡地叫着，冉冉地飛去了。After faintly hearing one or two explosions, the airplanes, droning, slowly flew away.也許有人死傷了罷，然而天下卻似乎更顯得太平。Perhaps someone had been killed or wounded, and yet the world seemed all the more peaceful for it.窗外的白楊的嫩葉，在日光下發烏金光，楡葉梅也比昨日開得更爛漫。Outside the window, the tender young leaves of the white poplar gleamed a dark gold in the sunlight, and the flowering almond had bloomed even more riotously than the day before.收拾了散亂滿牀的日報，拂去昨夜聚在書桌上的蒼白的微塵，我的四方的小書齋，今日也依然是所謂『窗明几淨。』Having tidied up the newspapers scattered all over the bed, and brushed away the pale dust that had gathered on the desk overnight, my small square study was today, as always, what is called 'bright windows and a clean desk.'

隐约听到一二爆发声以后，飞机嗡嗡地叫着，冉冉地飞去了。也许有人死伤了罢，然而天下却似乎更显得太平。窗外的白杨的嫩叶，在日光下发乌金光，楡叶梅也比昨日开得更烂漫。收拾了散乱满床的日报，拂去昨夜聚在书桌上的苍白的微尘，我的四方的小书斋，今日也依然是所谓『窗明几净。』

因爲或一種原因，我開手編校那歷來積壓在我這里的靑年作者的文稿了；For some reason or other, I set to work editing and collating the manuscripts of young authors that had long been piling up here with me;我要全都給一個淸理。I meant to give them all a thorough sorting-out.我照作品的年月看下去，這些不肯塗脂抹粉的靑年們的魂靈便依次屹立在我眼前。As I read on through the pieces in order of their dates, the souls of these young people, who refused to powder and rouge their faces, rose up before my eyes one after another.他們是綽約的，是純眞的，——阿，然而他們苦惱了，呻吟了，憤怒，而且終於粗暴了，你的可愛的靑年們。They were graceful, they were pure and true — ah, but they had suffered, they had groaned, grown angry, and in the end turned rough and coarse, your dear young people.

因为或一种原因，我开手编校那历来积压在我这里的靑年作者的文稿了；我要全都给一个淸理。我照作品的年月看下去，这些不肯涂脂抹粉的靑年们的魂灵便依次屹立在我眼前。他们是绰约的，是纯真的，——阿，然而他们苦恼了，呻吟了，愤怒，而且终于粗暴了，你的可爱的靑年们。

魂靈被風沙打擊得粗暴，因爲這是人的魂靈，我愛這樣的魂靈；Their souls had been battered rough and coarse by wind and sand; and because these are human souls, I love such souls;我願意在無形無色的鮮血淋漓的粗暴上接吻。I am willing to kiss this formless, colorless, blood-dripping roughness.漂渺的名園中，奇花盛開着，紅顏的靜女正在超然無事地逍遙，鶴唳一聲，白雲鬱然而起……。In a misty, far-off famous garden, rare flowers bloom in profusion, a rosy-cheeked, tranquil maiden wanders idly at ease, aloof from all cares; a crane cries once, and white clouds rise up in dense billows……這自然使人神往的罷，然而我總記得我活在人間。This is, of course, enough to make one's spirit long for it, and yet I always remember that I live in the human world.

魂灵被风沙打击得粗暴，因为这是人的魂灵，我爱这样的魂灵；我愿意在无形无色的鲜血淋漓的粗暴上接吻。漂渺的名园中，奇花盛开着，红颜的静女正在超然无事地逍遥，鹤唳一声，白云郁然而起……。这自然使人神往的罢，然而我总记得我活在人间。

我忽然記起一件事：兩三年前，我在北京大學的教員預備室裏，看見進來了一個並不熟識的靑年，默默地給我一包書，便出去了，打開看時，是一本淺草。I suddenly recalled something: two or three years ago, in the teachers' preparation room at Peking University, I saw a young man come in whom I did not know well; he silently handed me a parcel of books and then went out. When I opened it, it turned out to be a copy of Qiancao (Shallow Grass).就在這默默中，使我懂得了許多話。It was in that very silence that I came to understand a great many things.阿，這贈品是多麽豐饒呵！Ah, what a rich gift that was!可惜那淺草不再出版了，似乎只成了沈鐘的前身。It is a pity that Qiancao ceased publication, and seems to have become nothing more than the forerunner of Chenzhong (The Sunken Bell).那沈鐘就在這風沙澒洞中，深深地在人海的底裏寂寞地鳴動。That Sunken Bell now, amid this vast swirl of wind and sand, tolls on in solitude, deep down at the bottom of the sea of humanity.

我忽然记起一件事：两三年前，我在北京大学的教员预备室里，看见进来了一个并不熟识的靑年，默默地给我一包书，便出去了，打开看时，是一本浅草。就在这默默中，使我懂得了许多话。阿，这赠品是多么丰饶呵！可惜那浅草不再出版了，似乎只成了沈钟的前身。那沈钟就在这风沙澒洞中，深深地在人海的底里寂寞地鸣动。

野薊經了幾乎致命的摧折，還要開一朵小花，我記得托爾斯泰曾受了很大的感動，因此寫出一篇小說來。A wild thistle, after being nearly broken to death, still puts forth a small flower — I remember Tolstoy was once deeply moved by this, and so wrote a story about it.但是，草木在旱乾的沙漠中間，拼命伸長他的根，吸取深地中的水泉，來造成碧綠的林莽，自然是爲了自己的『生』的，然而使疲勞枯渴的旅人，一見就怡然覺得遇到了暫時息肩之所，這是如何的可以感激，而且可以悲哀的事！？But when plants, in the midst of a parched desert, strain with all their might to stretch their roots down to draw up the springs of water deep in the earth, and thereby form a stretch of green forest and undergrowth, they do so, naturally, for the sake of their own 'life'; and yet, for the weary and thirst-parched traveler, the sight of it brings the glad feeling of having found a place to rest his shoulders for a while — how moving a thing this is to be grateful for, and yet how sad a thing as well!?

野蓟经了几乎致命的摧折，还要开一朵小花，我记得托尔斯泰曾受了很大的感动，因此写出一篇小说来。但是，草木在旱干的沙漠中间，拼命伸长他的根，吸取深地中的水泉，来造成碧绿的林莽，自然是为了自己的『生』的，然而使疲劳枯渴的旅人，一见就怡然觉得遇到了暂时息肩之所，这是如何的可以感激，而且可以悲哀的事！？

沈鐘的無題——代啓事——說：『有人說：我們的社會是一片沙漠。——如果當眞是一片沙漠，這雖然荒漠一點也還靜肅，雖然寂寞一點也還會使你感覺蒼茫。The untitled piece in Chenzhong — serving as a notice — says: 'Some say: our society is a stretch of desert. — If it were truly a desert, then though desolate, it would still be tranquil; though lonely, it would still make you feel the vastness of things.何至於像這樣的混沌，這樣的陰沈，而且這樣的離奇變幻！』How could it have come to be as chaotic as this, as gloomy as this, and as bizarrely changeable as this!'

沈钟的无题——代启事——说：『有人说：我们的社会是一片沙漠。——如果当真是一片沙漠，这虽然荒漠一点也还静肃，虽然寂寞一点也还会使你感觉苍茫。何至于像这样的混沌，这样的阴沈，而且这样的离奇变幻！』

是的，靑年的魂靈屹立在我眼前，他們已經粗暴了，或者將要粗暴了，然而我愛這些流血和隱痛的魂靈，因爲他使我覺得是在人間，是在人間活着。Yes, the souls of the young rise up before my eyes; they have already turned rough and coarse, or are about to turn rough and coarse, and yet I love these souls that bleed and suffer in hidden pain, because they make me feel that I am in the human world, that I am alive in the human world.

是的，靑年的魂灵屹立在我眼前，他们已经粗暴了，或者将要粗暴了，然而我爱这些流血和隐痛的魂灵，因为他使我觉得是在人间，是在人间活着。

在編校中夕陽居然西下，燈火給我接續的光。While I was editing, the evening sun, before I knew it, had set in the west, and the lamplight took over, giving me its continuing light.各樣的靑春在眼前一一馳去了，身外但有昏黃環繞。All the varied forms of youth galloped past before my eyes, one by one, and gone; outside myself there was nothing but a dim yellow gloom all around.我疲勞着，��着紙煙，在無名的思想中靜靜地合了眼睛，看見很長的夢。I grew weary, and puffing at a cigarette, I quietly closed my eyes amid nameless thoughts, and saw a very long dream.忽而警覺，身外也還是環繞着昏黃；Suddenly I started awake, and outside myself there was still the same dim yellow gloom all around;煙篆在不動的空氣中上升，如幾片小小夏雲，徐徐幻出難以指名的形象。The seal-script curls of smoke rose in the still air, like a few small wisps of summer cloud, slowly transforming into shapes hard to name.

在编校中夕阳居然西下，灯火给我接续的光。各样的靑春在眼前一一驰去了，身外但有昏黄环绕。我疲劳着，𪮆着纸烟，在无名的思想中静静地合了眼睛，看见很长的梦。忽而警觉，身外也还是环绕着昏黄；烟篆在不动的空气中上升，如几片小小夏云，徐徐幻出难以指名的形象。

（一九二六年四月十日。）(April 10, 1926.)