十五　失敗的黃色藥包 The Failed Yellow Medicine Packet

開拔的隊伍在南山道轉彎時，孩子在母親懷中向父親送別。As the departing column rounded the bend on the road by Nanshan, a child in his mother’s arms bade his father farewell.行過大樹道，人們滑過河邊。After passing the avenue of great trees, the people slipped and slid along the riverbank.他們的衣裝和步伐看起來不像一個隊伍，但衣服下藏著猛壯的心。Their clothes and their gait made them look nothing like a proper column, but beneath those clothes were fierce, sturdy hearts.這些心把他們帶走，他們的心銅一般凝結著出發。Those hearts bore them onward, hearts hardened like bronze for the march.最末一刻大山坡還未曾遮沒最後的一個人，一個抱在媽媽懷中的小孩他呼叫「爹爹」。At the very last moment, before the great hillside had hidden the last man from sight, a child in his mother’s arms cried, “Daddy!”孩子的呼叫什麼也沒得到，父親連手臂也沒搖動一下，孩子好像把聲響撞到了岩石。The child’s cry brought no response; his father did not so much as wave an arm, and it was as though the sound had struck against rock.

开拔的队伍在南山道转弯时，孩子在母亲怀中向父亲送别。行过大树道，人们滑过河边。他们的衣装和步伐看起来不像一个队伍，但衣服下藏著猛壮的心。这些心把他们带走，他们的心铜一般凝结著出发。最末一刻大山坡还未曾遮没最后的一个人，一个抱在妈妈怀中的小孩他呼叫「爹爹」。孩子的呼叫什么也没得到，父亲连手臂也没摇动一下，孩子好像把声响撞到了岩石。

女人們一進家屋，屋子好像空了；As soon as the women entered their homes, the rooms seemed empty;房屋好像修造在天空，素白的陽光在窗上，卻不帶來一點意義。The houses seemed to have been built in the sky; pale white sunlight lay upon the windows, yet brought not the least meaning with it.她們不需要男人回來，只需要好消息。They did not need their men to return; they needed only good news.消息來時，是五天過後，老趙三赤著他顯露筋骨的腳奔向李二嬸子去告訴：When news came, five days later, old Zhao San ran barefoot, the sinews and bones of his feet showing, to tell Second Aunt Li:

女人们一进家屋，屋子好像空了；房屋好像修造在天空，素白的阳光在窗上，却不带来一点意义。她们不需要男人回来，只需要好消息。消息来时，是五天过后，老赵三赤著他显露筋骨的脚奔向李二婶子去告诉：

「聽說青山他們被打散啦！」顯然趙三是手足無措，他的鬍子也震驚起來，似乎忙著要從他的嘴巴跳下。“They say Qingshan and the others have been scattered!” Zhao San was plainly at a loss; even his beard quivered in alarm, as though in a hurry to leap from his mouth.

「听说青山他们被打散啦！」显然赵三是手足无措，他的胡子也震惊起来，似乎忙著要从他的嘴巴跳下。

「真的有人回來了嗎？」“Has someone really come back?”

「真的有人回来了吗？」

李二嬸的喉嚨變做細長的管道，使聲音出來做出多角形。Second Aunt Li’s throat became a long, narrow pipe, twisting her voice into a many-cornered shape.

李二婶的喉咙变做细长的管道，使声音出来做出多角形。

「真的平兒回來啦。」趙三說。“Yes—Ping’er has come back,” Zhao San said.

「真的平儿回来啦。」赵三说。

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嚴重的夜，從天上走下。A grave night descended from the sky.日本兵團剿打魚村，白旗屯，和三家子……Japanese troops were sweeping through Yucun, Baiqitun, and Sanjiazi...

严重的夜，从天上走下。日本兵团剿打鱼村，白旗屯，和三家子……

平兒正在王寡婦家，他休息在情婦的心懷中。Ping’er was at Widow Wang’s house, resting in his lover’s embrace.外面狗叫，聽到日本人說話，平兒越牆逃走；Dogs barked outside; hearing Japanese voices, Ping’er climbed over the wall and fled;他埋進一片蒿草中，蛤蟆在腳間跳。He buried himself in a patch of wormwood, while toads leaped between his feet.

平儿正在王寡妇家，他休息在情妇的心怀中。外面狗叫，听到日本人说话，平儿越墙逃走；他埋进一片蒿草中，蛤蟆在脚间跳。

「非拿住這小子不可，怕是他們和義勇軍接連。」“We must catch that fellow. They may be in league with the Volunteer Army.”

「非拿住这小子不可，怕是他们和义勇军接连。」

在蒿草中他聽清這是誰們在說：「走狗們。」From the wormwood he clearly heard who was speaking: “The running dogs.”

在蒿草中他听清这是谁们在说：「走狗们。」

平兒他聽清的情婦被拷打：Ping’er distinctly heard his lover being tortured:

平儿他听清的情妇被拷打：

「男人哪裡去啦？──快說，再不說槍斃！」“Where has the man gone?—Speak up! If you don’t, we’ll shoot you!”

「男人哪里去啦？──快说，再不说枪毙！」

他們不住罵：「你們這些母狗，豬養的。」They kept cursing: “You bitches, you swine-spawn!”

他们不住骂：「你们这些母狗，猪养的。」

平兒完全赤身，他走了很遠。Ping’er was stark naked, and he walked a long way.他去扯衣襟拭汗，衣襟沒有了，在腿上扒了一下，於是才發現自己的身影落在地面和光身的孩子一般。He reached for his coat front to wipe away his sweat, but there was no coat; he pawed at his thigh, and only then discovered that the figure he cast upon the ground was like that of a naked child.

平儿完全赤身，他走了很远。他去扯衣襟拭汗，衣襟没有了，在腿上扒了一下，于是才发现自己的身影落在地面和光身的孩子一般。

二里半的麻婆子被殺，羅圈腿被殺，死了兩個人，村中安息兩天。At Erli Ban, Ma Pozi was killed and Luoquantui was killed—two people dead—and the village had two days of peace.第三天又是要死人的日子。The third day was another day for people to die.日本兵滿村竄走，平兒到金枝家棚頂去過夜。Japanese soldiers swarmed all over the village, and Ping’er went to spend the night in the loft of Jinzhi’s house.金枝說：Jinzhi said:

二里半的麻婆子被杀，罗圈腿被杀，死了两个人，村中安息两天。第三天又是要死人的日子。日本兵满村窜走，平儿到金枝家棚顶去过夜。金枝说：

「不行呀！“You can’t!棚頂方才也來小鬼子翻過。」The little devils searched the loft only a moment ago.”

「不行呀！棚顶方才也来小鬼子翻过。」

平兒於是在田間跑著，槍彈不住向他放射，平兒的眼睛不會轉彎，他聽有人近處叫：So Ping’er ran through the fields, bullets firing at him without cease; Ping’er’s eyes could not see around corners, and he heard someone nearby shouting:

平儿于是在田间跑著，枪弹不住向他放射，平儿的眼睛不会转弯，他听有人近处叫：

「拿活的，拿活的。……」“Take him alive! Take him alive!...”

他錯覺的聽到了一切，他遇見一扇門推進去，一個老頭在燒飯，平兒快流眼淚了：In his confusion he seemed to hear everything; he came upon a door and pushed his way in. An old man was cooking, and Ping’er was almost in tears:

他错觉的听到了一切，他遇见一扇门推进去，一个老头在烧饭，平儿快流眼泪了：

「老伯伯，救命，把我藏起來吧！“Uncle, save me—hide me somewhere!快救命吧！」Please, save me quickly!”

「老伯伯，救命，把我藏起来吧！快救命吧！」

老頭子說：「什麼事？」The old man said, “What is it?”

老头子说：「什么事？」

「日本子捉我。」“The Japanese are after me.”

平兒鼻子流血，好像他說到日本子才流血。Blood ran from Ping’er’s nose, as though it had begun to bleed only when he spoke of the Japanese.他向全屋四面張望，就像連一條縫也沒尋到似的，他轉身要跑，老人捉住，出了後門，盛糞的長形的籠子在門旁，掀起糞籠老人說：He looked desperately all around the room, as though he could not find so much as a crack to hide in; he turned to run, but the old man caught hold of him and took him out the back door. Beside it stood a long basket for carrying manure; lifting it, the old man said:

平儿鼻子流血，好像他说到日本子才流血。他向全屋四面张望，就像连一条缝也没寻到似的，他转身要跑，老人捉住，出了后门，盛粪的长形的笼子在门旁，掀起粪笼老人说：

「你就爬進去，輕輕喘氣。」“Crawl under there, and breathe softly.”

「你就爬进去，轻轻喘气。」

老人用粥飯塗上紙條把後門封起來，他到鍋邊吃飯。The old man pasted strips of paper over the back door with rice gruel, then went back to the stove to eat.糞籠下的平兒聽見來人和老人講話，接著他便聽到有人在弄門閂，門就要開了，自己就要被捉了！Beneath the manure basket, Ping’er heard the newcomers talking with the old man; then he heard someone fumbling with the door bar—the door was about to open, and he was about to be caught!他想要從籠子跳出來。He wanted to leap out from under the basket.但，很快那些人，哪些魔鬼去了！But very soon those men—those devils—were gone!

老人用粥饭涂上纸条把后门封起来，他到锅边吃饭。粪笼下的平儿听见来人和老人讲话，接著他便听到有人在弄门闩，门就要开了，自己就要被捉了！他想要从笼子跳出来。但，很快那些人，哪些魔鬼去了！

平兒從安全的糞籠出來，滿臉糞屑，白臉染著紅血條，鼻子仍然流血，他的樣子已經很可慘。Ping’er emerged from the safety of the manure basket, his face covered with flecks of dung, his pale face streaked red with blood, his nose still bleeding; he was already a pitiful sight.

平儿从安全的粪笼出来，满脸粪屑，白脸染著红血条，鼻子仍然流血，他的样子已经很可惨。

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李青山這次他信任「革命軍」有用，逃回村來，他不同別人一樣帶回衰喪的樣子，他在王婆家說：This time, Li Qingshan had come to believe that the “Revolutionary Army” was of some use. When he escaped back to the village, he did not return looking as dejected as the others; at Granny Wang’s house he said:

李青山这次他信任「革命军」有用，逃回村来，他不同别人一样带回衰丧的样子，他在王婆家说：

「革命軍所好是他不混亂幹事，他們有紀律，這回我算相信，紅鬍子算完蛋：自己紛爭，亂撞胡撞。」“The good thing about the Revolutionary Army is that they don’t act recklessly; they have discipline. Now I truly believe the Red Beards are finished: they quarrel among themselves and blunder about every which way.”

「革命军所好是他不混乱干事，他们有纪律，这回我算相信，红胡子算完蛋：自己纷争，乱撞胡撞。」

這次聽眾很少，人們不相信青山。This time there were few listeners; people did not believe Qingshan.村人天生容易失望，每個人容易失望。The villagers were born quick to lose hope; every one of them was quick to despair.每個人覺得完了！Everyone felt it was all over!只有老趙三，他不失望，他說：Only old Zhao San did not despair. He said:

这次听众很少，人们不相信青山。村人天生容易失望，每个人容易失望。每个人觉得完了！只有老赵三，他不失望，他说：

「那麼再組織起來去當革命軍吧！」“Then let’s organize ourselves again and join the Revolutionary Army!”

「那么再组织起来去当革命军吧！」

王婆覺得趙三說話和孩子一般可笑。Granny Wang thought Zhao San’s words as laughable as a child’s.但是她沒笑他。But she did not laugh at him.她對身邊坐著戴男人帽子的當過鬍子救國的女英雄說：She turned to the woman beside her, who wore a man’s cap and had once been a bandit and a heroine fighting to save the nation, and asked:

王婆觉得赵三说话和孩子一般可笑。但是她没笑他。她对身边坐著戴男人帽子的当过胡子救国的女英雄说：

「死的就丟下，那麼受傷的怎麼受傷的怎樣了？」“The dead have to be left behind, then—but what of the wounded? What happened to them?”

「死的就丢下，那么受伤的怎么受伤的怎样了？」

「受微傷的不都回來了嗎！“Haven’t all the lightly wounded come back?受重傷那就管不了，死就是啦！」As for the badly wounded, nothing could be done for them; they simply died!”

「受微伤的不都回来了吗！受重伤那就管不了，死就是啦！」

正這時北村一個老婆婆瘋了似的哭著跑來和李青山拚命。Just then, an old woman from the north village came running in, weeping like a madwoman and ready to fight Li Qingshan to the death.她捧住頭，像捧住一塊石頭般地投向牆壁，嘴中發出短句：Clutching her head as though it were a stone, she hurled it against the wall, broken phrases coming from her mouth:

正这时北村一个老婆婆疯了似的哭著跑来和李青山拼命。她捧住头，像捧住一块石头般地投向墙壁，嘴中发出短句：

「李青山。……“Li Qingshan...仇人……Enemy...我的兒子讓你領走去喪命。」You led my son away to his death.”

「李青山。……仇人……我的儿子让你领走去丧命。」

人們拉開她，她有力掙扎，比一條瘋牛更有力：People pulled her away, but she struggled with greater strength than a maddened ox:

人们拉开她，她有力挣扎，比一条疯牛更有力：

「就這樣不行，你把我給小日本子送去吧！“This won’t do—you must hand me over to the little Japanese!我要死，……I want to die...到應死的時候了！……」The time has come for me to die!...”

「就这样不行，你把我给小日本子送去吧！我要死，……到应死的时候了！……」

她就這樣不住的捉她的頭髮，慢慢她倒下來，她換不上氣來，她輕輕拍著王婆的膝蓋：She went on clutching at her hair; slowly she collapsed, unable to catch her breath, and gently patted Granny Wang’s knee:

她就这样不住的捉她的头发，慢慢她倒下来，她换不上气来，她轻轻拍著王婆的膝盖：

「老姐姐，你也許知道我的心，十九歲守寡，守了幾十年，守這個兒子；……“Elder sister, perhaps you understand my heart. I was widowed at nineteen, and for decades I kept myself for this son...我那些挨餓的日子呀！Oh, all those days I went hungry!我跟孩子到山坡去割毛草，大雨來了，雨從山坡把娘兒兩個拍滾下來，我的頭，在我想是碎了，誰知道？I went with the child to the hillside to cut thatch. A downpour came, and the rain battered mother and child tumbling down the slope. My head—I thought it had shattered, but who could have known?還沒死……I still didn’t die...早死早完事。」The sooner one dies, the sooner it is over.”

「老姐姐，你也许知道我的心，十九岁守寡，守了几十年，守这个儿子；……我那些挨饿的日子呀！我跟孩子到山坡去割毛草，大雨来了，雨从山坡把娘儿两个拍滚下来，我的头，在我想是碎了，谁知道？还没死……早死早完事。」

她的眼淚一陣濕熱濕透王婆的膝蓋，她開始輕輕哭：A sudden flood of her hot tears soaked through Granny Wang’s knees, and she began to weep softly:

她的眼泪一阵湿热湿透王婆的膝盖，她开始轻轻哭：

「你說我還守什麼？……“Tell me, what have I left to live for?...我死了吧！Let me die!有日本子等著，菱花那丫頭也長不大，死了吧！」The Japanese are waiting; that little girl Linghua will never grow up either. Let us die!”

「你说我还守什么？……我死了吧！有日本子等著，菱花那丫头也长不大，死了吧！」

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果然死了，房樑上吊死的。And indeed they died—hanged from a roof beam.三歲孩子菱花小脖頸和祖母並排懸著，高掛起正像兩條瘦魚。Three-year-old Linghua’s little neck hung beside her grandmother’s, the two suspended high like a pair of skinny fish.

果然死了，房梁上吊死的。三岁孩子菱花小脖颈和祖母并排悬著，高挂起正像两条瘦鱼。

死亡率在村中又在開始快速，但是人們不怎樣覺察，患著傳染病一般地全村又在昏迷中掙扎。The death rate in the village began to rise rapidly again, but people scarcely noticed; like victims of an epidemic, the whole village once more struggled in a stupor.

死亡率在村中又在开始快速，但是人们不怎样觉察，患著传染病一般地全村又在昏迷中挣扎。

「愛國軍」從三家子經過，張著黃色旗，旗上有紅字「愛國軍」。The “Patriotic Army” passed through Sanjiazi, carrying yellow flags on which the red characters “Patriotic Army” were written.人們有的跟著去了！Some people followed them away!他們不知道怎麼愛國，愛國又有什麼用處，只是他們沒有飯吃啊！They did not know how one went about loving the country, or what use loving the country might be; it was simply that they had nothing to eat!

「爱国军」从三家子经过，张著黄色旗，旗上有红字「爱国军」。人们有的跟著去了！他们不知道怎么爱国，爱国又有什么用处，只是他们没有饭吃啊！

李青山不去，他說那也是鬍子編成的。Li Qingshan did not go; he said that army, too, was made up of bandits.老趙三為著「愛國軍」和兒子吵架：Old Zhao San quarreled with his son over the “Patriotic Army”:

李青山不去，他说那也是胡子编成的。老赵三为著「爱国军」和儿子吵架：

「我看你是應該去，在家裡若是傳出風聲去有人捉拿你。“I think you ought to go. If word gets out while you stay at home, someone may come to arrest you.跟去混混，到最末就是殺死一個日本鬼子也上算，也出出氣。Go along and make your way among them; even if in the end you only kill one Japanese devil, it will be worth it and let you vent some anger.年青氣壯，出一口氣也是好的。」You’re young and strong; it would do you good to let out your anger.”

「我看你是应该去，在家里若是传出风声去有人捉拿你。跟去混混，到最末就是杀死一个日本鬼子也上算，也出出气。年青气壮，出一口气也是好的。」

老趙三一點見識也沒有，他這樣盲動的說話使兒子不佩服，平兒同爹爹講話總是把眼睛繞著圈子斜視一下，或是不調諧的抖一兩下肩頭，這樣對待他，他非常不願意接受，有時老趙三自己想：Old Zhao San had not the least understanding of such matters. His reckless talk earned no respect from his son; whenever Ping’er spoke to his father, he would roll his eyes sideways or jerk his shoulders once or twice out of rhythm. Old Zhao San found such treatment very hard to bear, and sometimes thought to himself:

老赵三一点见识也没有，他这样盲动的说话使儿子不佩服，平儿同爹爹讲话总是把眼睛绕著圈子斜视一下，或是不调谐的抖一两下肩头，这样对待他，他非常不愿意接受，有时老赵三自己想：

「老趙三怎不是個小趙三呢？」“Why couldn’t old Zhao San have been a young Zhao San?”

「老赵三怎不是个小赵三呢？」